Page-Turner

I am an avid journaler. 

To those of you who have never kept a journal, this may seem strange to you.  There are two great moments that every journaler eagerly awaits; the starting and ending of a journal.  Finding yourself within the last couple pages you write more feverishly,  you try to fill in the last 5 pages so you don't have to bleed into the new one.  But most importantly you reflect on the past 7 months, or however long it took you to finish it and you look forward to what the future has to offer.  These momentous occasions take you out of the normal lapse of time and put you in so many places at once.

The completion and start of a journal don't always illustrate such a transition in real life.  Often, it's simply the way the pages fall; mid February when nothing is changing in your life or ironically shortly after a big change.  There is not always a correlation.  However, today I finished a journal on the verge of a very significant shift.  The closing of this chapter of my life, whatever it has been, ushers in the next chapter, whatever that will be. 

I find msyelf standing on the edge of a chasm of time and of space.  Crossing over the Atlantic from America to France, from student to professional life; from here to there.  I stand and gaze over the abyss to what will be and back over my failures and successes, hoping, that the momentum will be enough to make the leap.  I hope, because that's really all anyone can do.

I remind myself though, that to jump well, a secure footing is key.  Often my mind is anywhere but the moment; looking ahead or remembering, ignoring what is important right now.  To make this next leap, I need to have a solid connection to the present.

So here's to being in Terre Haute till I leave and staying up past my bedtime to read this story, my life, because I am enthralled with what is happening now and can't wait to see what the next chapter holds. 

Because my life is a page-turner.